My husband and I were thrilled when we received an invitation to my colleague’s birthday dinner at a high-end restaurant. I made sure to bring a thoughtful gift, thinking it was the polite thing to do. The evening was enjoyable, and everything seemed fine—until I got home. That’s when I received a text from the birthday girl: “Thanks for coming. Your part of the bill is $190 + tip.” I was stunned. I had already spent money on a nice gift, and now I was being asked to chip in for an expensive dinner? I ignored the message at first, but after a few hours, I decided to respond. I wrote back, “I think I have already paid you with the nice gift I brought ;).”
The next day at work, things took an unexpected turn. As soon as I walked in, I noticed people giving me strange looks. One of my colleagues rushed over and said, “Can you believe it? One of the girls refused to pay her part of the dinner last night! What a cheapskate!” I stayed quiet, not revealing that I was the one they were talking about. But the real shock came when I found the gift I had brought sitting on my desk. She had returned it!
I couldn’t believe it. I still feel that what she did was against basic etiquette. If you’re inviting people to celebrate your birthday, shouldn’t you cover the costs? Expecting guests to bring a gift and pay for an expensive meal seems unfair. Was I wrong to stand my ground?
