It started as a simple annoyance – coming home after grueling hospital shifts to find my key wouldn’t turn in the lock. The first time, I assumed it was just bad luck. The second time, I knew someone was messing with me. There, jammed deep in the keyhole, was another damn toothpick.
My brother Danny helped remove it, his face grim. “This wasn’t an accident,” he said, holding up the tiny wooden culprit. “Someone’s targeting you.” We set up his battered but reliable security camera, and what we caught on film made my blood boil.
There was Josh, my ex-boyfriend of six months, carefully inserting a toothpick into my lock with surgical precision. After catching him emotionally cheating with his “work friend” Amber, I’d ended things cleanly – or so I thought. Apparently, he’d decided vandalizing my property was an acceptable way to get my attention.
Instead of calling the police, I called Connor – my 6’4″ tattooed friend with a penchant for creative solutions. What followed was the most satisfying ambush I’ve ever orchestrated.
The next evening, we set our trap. I pretended to leave while Connor waited inside wearing my pink bathrobe (and nothing else). When Josh crept up to sabotage my lock again, Connor flung open the door, bathrobe gaping, wrench in hand. The look on Josh’s face as he sprinted away was priceless.
But the real victory came when I posted the security footage to TikTok with the caption: “When your ex keeps jamming toothpicks in your lock…” The video went viral with 3 million views. Even better? Josh’s boss (who happened to be Amber’s father) saw it. Last I heard, Josh was “pursuing other opportunities.”
